PET scan good, stomach bug bad at our house

The pictures above are snapshots taken last year. As part of the benefits package at Tom's work, our kids get 15-20 days a year at a great "back-up daycare" located close to his office, as I mention later in this post. Each time the kids go we get a written report of what they did that day along with a photo. These are some of my favorites. I used up our days last year by sending the boys every Thursday during the last three months of my pregnancy. The photos of Philip testify that he was going through his hat phase, which took place prior to his superhero phase. He was very specific about which hat he wanted to wear each day.

Yesterday's PET scan showed that the cancer has not spread to any areas the doctors weren't already aware of. That is good news. I was especially glad to hear it because as I was leaving I overheard a doctor talking to a technician about my scan and he said, "It looks bad now, but we might not see anything in a couple of months." Not exactly reassuring words. My oncologist said, "That's why he reads scans instead of seeing patients." I thought that was funny. She told me that what he meant was that medicine is amazing nowadays and even though the scan lights up really well in all the places where the cancer is, we hope we will see something different after treatment.

My mom is so cute. I went to hang out at her house for my 6 hours of solitary confinement during which I was radioactive, and she left a sign on the front door that said, "To my atomic girl who always radiates a glow..." telling me where to go. Then on the door of the bedroom she was putting me in she had another sign marked "Suite #1, enjoy your stay" and in the middle was a big circle with "No pregies" x'ed out inside. I love her creativity. She had a lunch all laid out for me on a tray and I got to relax all afternoon.

We are meeting with the oncologist on Friday to discuss the treatment plan and when it will start. I think I will be starting chemotherapy sometime next week. I am anxious to get going. This has been the longest three weeks of my life. Well, on second thought I'd say these weeks are tied with weeks 8-11 of my pregnancies. It is amazing how usually the months fly by and then time can stop dead in its tracks and absolutely DRAG day in and day out. Then you get through the tough times and suddenly years go by in a blink again.

Tom was saying this afternoon how it seems like once cancer affects your immediate circle, you find out it is everywhere. I took the kids to get their paperwork up to date at the daycare we occasionally use as part of the benefits package at Tom's job, and they were all so excited to see the boys again and to meet Fiona. (The last time we used the center was the day before she was born.) Then my favorite lady there, who is probably about my age and has a little one, told me they discovered something in her breast recently and she has to quickly wean her daughter so that she can have it biopsied. A couple of hours later, I got an email from a friend telling me about a girl we went to college with who died last weekend after nine years of battling brain tumors. Sigh.

Tom has been home today because dear, sweet Fiona shared her stomach bug with him. For his sake of course I wish he didn't have to be sick, but I realized I am in a fantastic mood because he is here with me, even if he is tucked away in the bedroom and we're trying to let him rest. As I was telling him last night, from the day I found out about my illness, I have been too stressed out to be in charge of anything. "You don't like to be in charge?" he asked skeptically. I explained that I normally adore being in charge (when we first got married he informed me that I really should stop bossing my brothers around, to which I responded that they need my guidance) but that it's too overwhelming at this time. I dropped the couple of extracurricular activities I was heading up, more because I knew treatment would conflict, but also because I can't handle the added stress right now. Even being at home with the kids is hard when no other adults are around. It is interesting to realize these things about myself and to analyze how I deal with crises.

On a humorous note, in addition to my lovely scar on my neck, which I am covering by exclusively wearing turtlenecks and collared shirts, I have a new bright red mark on my forehead. On Sunday we were cooking dinner and Tom accidentally bumped me while holding the crock pot lid, which dripped water into the pan on the stove, thus splashing hot oil all over me. Astoundingly, it came out of my shirt (good thing, since I only have so many long sleeved collared shirts) but left a nice burn on the forehead. I've been teasing him, "What, you found out the cancer wasn't going to get me so you thought you'd try to fry me in oil?" He apologized profusely and has taken my teasing very well. A night or two ago he announced that he was done feeling guilty. It doesn't really hurt much but I am self-conscious to have yet another very noticeable blemish. I put makeup on it every day and then forget about it, only to glance at a mirror later when the cover-up has worn off and start giggling or gasping about how ridiculous I look, depending on my mood. I felt this great need to explain it to the PET scan technician yesterday. She kind of gave me an odd look and said, "That's fine."

At the end of the day, the stomach bug claimed another victim: poor Philip. He cried that his stomach hurt all through dinner and bath time, and as I was lying on his bed reading One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish to the boys (another Dr. Seuss classic), I thought, "I'd better switch positions, because the last thing I want is for him to throw up on my head." It was a wise choice, as several minutes later he was emptying the contents of the last couple of days onto his pillow. I feel so sorry for my kids when they aren't feeling well. I sincerely hope it isn't going to hit Miles, because if the weather cooperates he is starting baseball tomorrow and he is really looking forward to it. That is going to be some good entertainment throughout the next couple of months!